Give yourself a special gift this Thanksgiving

So often we hear about how important it is to be grateful… grateful for our health (if we are fortunate enough to have that), grateful for our friends and family, grateful for food to eat and shelter to protect us. There are so many things to feel grateful for!

Yet, many of us forget to be grateful for… ourselves. Oh yes, it’s easy to give an intellectual nod to self-appreciation when asked. But I am speaking of a genuine, heartfelt love and appreciation of one’s self that we feel in our gut.

Some people no doubt merely forget to acknowledge themselves, or put it on the back burner. Others find it somehow strange or selfish, even immoral, or simply haven’t even thought about it.

Let me ask you a question. Have you ever told yourself that you are amazing or wonderful or beautiful or desirable or loveable?

I am amazing.

I am wonderful.

I am beautiful.

I am desirable.

I am loveable.

The list of things you could say is limited only by your imagination.

Here’s a sad thought: Maybe you can’t or won’t say these things because you don’t believe that they are true. They don’t fit with your self-image. Maybe you believe that these statements, and others like them, are simply lies when they pertain to you. Maybe they’re true for other people, but not for you. I could just say “How unfortunate” and move on, but that’s not what we’re about on this site!

If I can convince you to accept one premise, one simple statement to be true, your days of refusing to appreciate yourself on a deep emotional level – a place where you can feel things – will be over…

You possess, right now at this moment, every beautiful, wonderful, God-given quality known to man.

It’s not that you possess only positive qualities. That wouldn’t be true, would it? But in addition to those seemingly “negative” qualities of selfishness, greed, jealousy, and so on, you are filled with every desirable trait as well.

Perhaps you get uncomfortable saying, for instance, “I am wonderful” because you don’t truly believe it deep down, or if you do, you only think it’s 1% true. Maybe you think are really are wonderful, but then you get stopped in your tracks by an attack of the ‘yea-buts.’ “I am wonderful in some ways, yea, but look how awful I can be too.”

But here’s the thing. Even if you don’t yet believe you are wonderful… or desirable… or loveable (at least not enough to recite “I am” before it), as long as you believe that under certain circumstances you have the capacity to be 1% more of these things, that is enough to be able to give yourself a Love Bath.

To give yourself a Love Bath, choose a time when you are alone. I like to choose right before bedtime, but you can do this in the morning, when driving a car, or virtually anytime you feel like it.

You make up the words as you go along, whatever enters your mind. Choose words that most admire in a person, what you believe yourself to be deep down, or what you would like to be even if you’re having trouble believing it is true. To give yourself a Love Bath, say to yourself something along the lines of the following:

I am amazing. I am wonderful. I am beautiful. I am desirable. I am loveable. I am brilliant. I am sexy. I am remarkable. I am in love with myself. I am unique. I am special. I am divine….(and on, and on, and on)

If reciting a certain positive quality feels uncomfortable because you doubt its truth, stay with it and repeat that one several times, over and over again, until you get so used to the word that it loses its discomfort. Sometimes you might even find yourself laughing after a while, especially if you look in a mirror while saying it. This is good!

If reciting a certain word feels particularly delicious, keep circling back to that word again and again because it feels nice to do so, and feeling “nice” means you are bathing your brain in “happy juice,” those lovely little brain chemicals that stick around for awhile and begin the process of making longstanding changes in the way you believe yourself to be.

Play with this for a while, using your creativity to come up with as many great qualities as you can think of. Feel free to experiment with different words. When you feel like stopping, then stop. Do this for five minutes or so, or however long you’d like.

Immerse yourself in a Love Bath. It might just become a regular part of your day!

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12 Responses to “Give yourself a special gift this Thanksgiving”

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